surviving you always

The Giver Takes
what is the giver really taking?
is it the taker?
who's directing traffic here, anyway?
are there no strategies
to win in love?
who invented immortality anyway?

where have your virtues taken you
along with your search for meaning?
climbing and staggering your pitiful
existence
while bargaining for time.

where do our morals come from?
were they inflicted?
what's in a blood line anyway?
why are we led to slaughter?
we can find it ourselves.
who's calling my number here, anyway?

slave, grind that wheel of endless cycles.
grip hard to endure
hours and hours of damnation
spinning throughout this haste and
confusion
yes! there's hope on the other end of
those strings

why do we get back up when the next fall
is so much harder?
who's setting examples here, anyway?
when are we going to find something
truly worth suffering for?
why make sense of this, anyway?

picture a world so simple and thoughtful
with smiling neighbors, grapestick fences
and images falling from the sky
blessing you with contentment.

Lot's Seed
I was minding my business
by the gates of sodem
when these two angels
suddenly strolled in
whom I invited
to enjoy a feast
when my neighbors
started to freak

did I leave something behind
don't look back
I've never seen a city explode
don't look back
but did I leave something behind
don't look back
I've never seen a city explode
don't look back

now I'm a widower
living in the mountains
all my possessions
lost in the explosion
but I am content with
life in a cave
with my two daughters
who know how to serve wine

did I leave something behind
don't look back
I've never seen a city explode
don't look back
but did I leave something behind
don't look back
I've never seen a city explode
don't look back

Sunk
when I see those eyes
on your falling face
sobbing in discouragement
for your falling efforts
we've seen days like this
burned out pointlessly
and we're living it now
isn't it nice to know
we are nothing less
we are sunk together
when I reach those lips
on your sunken cheeks
I'll turn your hysteria
into optimism
we'll find deliverance
while we've still a prayer
we'll climb out of here
isn't it nice to know that
we are nothing less
we are sunk together
tell me how long have you known
tell me how long have you known
tell me how long have you known
tell me how long have you known
drained out from distress
as you stun me with incompetence
and suck me in the vastness
of your unearthly love
I was only looking for
something in your sturdy legs
move it down the boulevard
the only sign we'll ever need
tell me how long has it been
tell me how long has it been
tell me how long has it been
tell me how long has it been

Speak
sound and calm are these rueful years
where the creatures scratch on your
screen in vein
till the dawn let's in it's repenting
forces
oh she must be sinless because she's
never been touched
and I feel remorse in every motion
lost
as I waste in your fields waiting for
healing
oh I will heal you now, oh I will heal
you now
oh I can feel you now, on I can feel
you now
feel, speak to me
feel, speak to me
feel, speak to me
feel
speak
feel the warmth she dragged in from
the storm
and I can taste the heartlessness
that lives in vows
I hold you to when I could not hold you
because I've always wanted you but I
never knew what for
until I heard you plead so unselfishly
in this world I've wandered anticipating
this moment
when I can heal you now, oh I can heal
you now
on I can feel you now, yes I can feel
you now
speak, speak, speak it to me

The House, The Concrete, The System
coughed in the evening it might be leading
to a cold my god I hope not
I can't miss a single day at the office
set the alarm for me my dear
the house
is where he found warmth
the concrete
as his roads were paved
the system
by those he succeeded
still he give his undying devotion to
the house
is where the family stayed
the concrete
as they confirmed their love
the system
and counted their exemptions
still he gave his undying devotion to
the house
is where he felt tranquil
the concrete
and rest his weariness
the system
from his long days of deception
still he gives his undying commitment to
the sewer
the image of such vast beginnings
the gutter
one step closer to
the sidewalk
to stride upon his crumbling arch
cherishing the illusive victory
as it would be for necessity's sake
to wallow in one's abandon
given up on a luxurious life
for the sake of a few comforting thoughts

Remnants
I can't believe
we are still desperate
was the reply given
to an awesome gesture
made at the table
where the matter was carved
and the curious offended
deeply
but to our amazement
no manners were regarded
as we left the temple
with our hearts unfolded

and it was much easier then
to believe there was a way
to out grow these primitive feelings
which I feel for you
with a sentiment so soft and pure
the reality of

I can't foresee
any phases of refuge
to shoulder my weakness
and my solemn sureness
I need these moments
to reach through your wounds
I hope my faith
will survive you

and it was much colder then
as we laid with such lifelessness
uninvolvement was the treason
that scarred your past
like the nights we'd laid awaken from crying
how could we have lived past that day
it was easier then
to believe there was a way
to outgrow these primitive feelings
which I feel for you
with a sentiment so soft and pure
the reality of
shock
the first was in betrayal
the second weak desires
the third confused sentiment
the fourth loneliness
the fifth drunk parades
the sixth sad seductions
the seventh was you
I can't believe
I won't believe
I can't believe
we are still desperate

The Cat. Cracker
one morning while the sun was still rising
I walked up the stairs all the way to the top
my aching legs felt flushed with relief
as I stood there all alone
and the wind blew cold and hard
it had been years since I'd been up there
under different conditions
under different convictions
under different convictions
and the view was still the same
but so was the awesome drop
suddenly the earth shook
in it's predestined manner
and all the beautiful glistening columns gave away
all the little everybody, everywhere
everyone, everywhere
everywhere, everywhere down below
and I sank so low inside myself I was safe
I was the catalyst
I was the motivator
I was the receiver of fault
responsibility defined in his own private madness
I could still see myself gliding
gliding above the earth
gliding, down down down

Our Discovery
this hour of discovery
we hold new beliefs
with unmerited favor
she is received
theologians will argue
she walks without fault
and leaves no prophecy or fantasy
unfulfilled

she is government
she is church
she is hunger
she is thirst
she is the tree of life
and you are humbled

eyes as dark as her past
consumes you to look upward
can not be impressed or pleased
hasn't aged in centuries
all your ambitions are forged
upon her nakedness
all grievances are welcomed here

she is government
she is church
she is hunger
she is thirst
she is the tree of life
and you are humbled

her mascara runs for your casted soul
you roam with assuian of the cordereal world
eclipse hung over this dreary night when angels
are sided
with phantom pains of a city amputated
so lost, so sad, so scared, and powerful
an instinctive creature, timid, not yet violated,
calls you
come quietly, come quietly, breed with us

on a sunday, cool and clear
an ocean breathes life in a bottle
and we unravel, ancient myths
from the deepness, of this cliff
where ever sense, the lost of eden
we were so inconvenienced
and I wanted nothing more
then that same branch you grabbed hold of
seeing you through ascending passages
to a vintage that's forever plowing
on a monday, true and fair
emotions bring life to it's fullness
as we unleash whose aging mystics
who took falls for this day of refuge
where ever sense that agnostic evening
we were so inconvenienced
and I wanted nothing more
then that same branch you grabbed hold of
seeing you through ascending passages
to a vintage that's forever flowing
but the mystery of her garden was, yeah
who let the snake in

A Good Night's Bleeding
far from an illusion
is the knife in his neck
which sinks through his pillow
as the mirror turns back
behind the steady hand
is our hero who's the killer
caked with coolness
his exit is true
so is his reason for leaving
so is his reason for leaving
so is his reason for leaving
so is his reason
far from an illusion
is the logic that we let go of
that sinks through his pillow
of obsessions
a scream from the basement
threw my ear to the floor
when I began to wonder
if I was going to be saved
an act of tribulation
pulled my name from his list
while acting out my salvation
on this morning filled with mist
all in a good night's bleeding
all in a good night's bleeding
all in a good night's bleeding
all in a good night's

Craving The Center
on the shoulder
the road is smoother
where your best launch
won't take me off
I can't be so understanding
when it's the center I crave
on the blackboard
it doesn't seem that hard
where my efforts
point me westward
I can't be so understanding
when it's the center i crave
on the shoulder
the road is smoother
where your best love
won't let me off
I can't be so understanding
when it's the center I crave

YHWH On Acid
calls from you still ring through my eyes
those sounds I cursed when we were also lost
still I sized it all never seeing further
then the fainting image on a talkative mirror
that said my head holds thoughts, my head holds
thoughts, my head holds thoughts, my head holds
thoughts
of what we were before we were bought
so rest as I assure you memories can only haunt you
cut not deprive you of the passion which is
now
it started when an eastbound jetliner went down
on a small suburbia where the numbered curbs bleed
into the eyes of prayers laid countless entangled
dismembered as the meaning of life well I found
it in your thighs
so give me something sacred fill in the vacancy
I reserve for savours like you, pull me through
pull me through
gushing freeways bodypiled lobbys
where I don't have to be registered, preferred
observed, or rewarded
what I want is cold and enamel what I feel is
smooth and hard
what I think is sick and ambitious
so take me tomorrow not today put me on a
later flight
yes I think I believe now that it's convenient
there are troops on the pavement, meetings is
the basement
secession in out hearts terrorist in the
school yards
fasting in the prisons, masiait has risen
the curfew is set at six, the dogs are working
double shifts
but the last time I saw you, you were lying on
allegence fields
all I could comprehend is that I failed you
again
nothings is beyond me when you are under me
you are below me heartfully soulfully
what I would to do possess the love you so
freely give
and stick something sensible inside of you
but the last time I saw you, you were lying on
allegence fields
as you gave a solemn stare into the heavens
(you're on your own now)